May 9th - I really did not need to see that.......

If you ever want to know when it is supposed to rain just check out the Alive-n-Kickin’ gig schedule. It is with most certainty that the rains occur during load-in and load-out of most every date we play and this past weekend at Cancun Cantina West in Hagerstown was no exception. The spring deluge that has saturated the earth and precluded me from moving my yard (I am applying for savannah status – maybe a wild life preserve) did not keep the patrons away from Cancun West nor did it dampen our spirits. If anything, it fueled the motivational fire, as wet weather limits the options people have of things to do on a spring night.

So after a lazy journey up I-70, over Braddock mountain and down into the vale, our destination was at hand. Gear was schlepped into the club and erected into its appropriate place. The stage extension was brought forth, much to the puzzlement and bewilderment of the staff and patrons. In no time the entire production was erected, plugged-in, tested, fine-tuned, and ready for an 80’s metal extravaganza of epic proportions. We then exited to our rooms at the Days Inn to cleanse, dress, primp, and meditate in preparation for the concert.

Naturally the show was nothing but energy, fun, and excitement the entire evening. We made lots of new friends and saw many old ones as well. Thanks a bunch go out to the birthday girls Kim and Dani, John and the crew from room 218, Rita & Teresa, Jeff, Colin & Tracy, Brian & Amanda, Tony, Cora, “50 Cent”, Steve, Karen & Greg, Thanks also to Bill and pal for the great sound mix and Jen and the gang at CC West for the hospitality. We look forward to our next show there on August 1st. Final thanks to Boots for hauling gear, hydration, pictures, and repairs. Your boots and attire really make for wonderful expressions on the fans.

It seems the fun and excitement does not end with the completion of the show. Several of us made our hungry way to the Denny’s up the road at 2:30 am. While admiring a Mitsubishi Eclipse, movement in the car startled us. The emergence of a woman’s head from the area of a guy’s trousers led us to assume only one thing, that the gentleman was on the receiving end of a snarlin’. That’s one heck of a way to end the night, eh? I think the guy knew we saw him because he gave us a hearty wave from across Denny's, a big east-west grin on his face.

Our next night of adventure is Friday May 16th at Cancun Cantina in Hanover, Md. New songs are going to be debuted and this will be Glenn’s first gig with AnK in the Baltimore area so come on out and show the new guy some AnK love!

“Come a little closer baby it’s all right. Maybe we can start a little fire tonight……”

May 3rd - Adversity part deux

You know, illness can really test the character and mettle of the individuals facing its ramifications. A few months back our own Corrupt Beast was unable to perform due to some virulent strain of bubonic plague. Luckily, Myles Evans was able to fill-in and save the night. This time our own Billy Harris was struck down by food poisoning and unable to make the show. Luckily Cryers is not too far from my home though I have to admit I was not too pleased in having to turn around 10 minutes from the club to go back home and get my keyboard rig. Arriving at the club an hour later then originally planned, I erected my keyboard and bass rigs in a most expeditious fashion while the rest of the fellas revamped the setlist. Being the consummate professionals we are, we were able to pull off the evening with only the most minimal of glitches and the crowd at Cryers responded in a most positive fashion. The women were so caught up in the fever of the night’s festivities that a trio of Leonardtown’s own tore the shirt off Steve’s back while he was playing! Needless to say, the Corrupt One did not miss a beat while being defrocked.

Thanks go out to a lot of people. Thanks to Peggy & Steve and Jeff & Cat for the years of support of AnK. We salute you! Thanks also to Dawn & Mike J. and Karen for checking out how a dentist rocks. Shout out as well to Al, Rose, Jim, Cindy, Meredith, Kelly, and Mike. Final kudo to Brian Gullin for the great sound, awesome light show, and the incredible ability to play bass on the fly while I slid back over to keys.

The May tour continues with Cancun Cantina West in Hagerstown this Friday May 9th. Last trip to this Western Maryland outpost turned out to be a fun filled, alcohol coated, dance riddled gala of epic proportions and we expect no less bedlam this go around. If you missed it before you will truly hate yourself if you don’t make it this Friday. See you there!

“Ain’t looking for nothing but a good time and it don’t get better then this.”

May 1st - The Winds of Change

Change is the only constant and Alive-n-Kickin’ is no more immune to its effects then anyone or anything else in the universe. Out stalwart shredder for the past 4 years, Ed Avella, has moved on, having received an excellent career opportunity in Atlanta that anyone in their right mind could not turn down. Ed has worked very hard and this promotion is much deserved and we are sure he will excel at the challenges faced before him. It is a bittersweet time for us because we are thrilled at the opportunity Ed has been given yet are sad at him having to move on. We’ll miss you on the stage, big guy (…sniffle…)

Well, obviously you need a guitar player to play the best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal so we in Alive-n-Kickin’ would like to welcome Glenn Campbell into the fold. Glenn was the guitarist form No Strings Attached (NSA) and those of you who were around in the glory days of 80’s metal, one of the top flight shredders on the scene, blistering the fretboard in the band Temper Temper. Please help give Glenn a special AnK welcome that only you people know how to do. As with Billy, I’ll have wipes and Bandicide handy for the clean up.

April 12th - “My name is Ed Avella and I approve this message……………”

Actually, Ed approved of lots of paired objects at McAvoy’s this past Saturday night, the primary thing being dual-fisted helpings of Smirnoff Ice. I have to admit the look of bewilderment by the patrons at our sound check of the 1st half of Savatage’s Edge of Thorns was humorous. It was in the vein of, “what the hell kind of hard rock band is that?!?” but it turned out to be all good as everyone quickly fell in love with AnK as we belted out their favorite 80’s hard rock & heavy metal tunes. Check out the pictures of the stage dancers for a small glimpse of what I am talking about.

Adam and the gang have really invested some time, money, and love into McAvoy’s. The place has a great menu and a wonderful atmosphere and ambience. It is definitely a place to enjoy time out with friends and a great club to see a band in a more intimate and cozy environment.

Thanks to Kelley for taking control of the lights and pictures. What a joy it is to watch a seasoned AnK veteran band aid hard at work. Poetry in motion to be sure. Thanks to Pete & Dan for the help, thanks also to Robin, Chris (how do you put up with 5 days a week of Billy?), Tracy, Tony B., Kim, Christine, Dave & Paula, the weightlifting dude, Rob, Kathy & Ron, Travis, and Nick for helping out on Wanted Dead or Alive. Thanks also to Barry & Mark for the great sound and the eclectic break music.

The next couple of weeks has us recharging our 80’s batteries (hey, we aren’t 20 anymore, you know?) before firing up the AnK tour caravan for a glut of awesome shows in May, which will begin with Cryers Back Road Inn on May 3rd for a pre-Cinco de Mayo celebration. We look forward to seeing all you peeps there!

"Cause I don't care what the people are thinking. I ain't drunk, I'm just drinkin'!"

April 11th - Packed & Hoppin'!!!!

What a wonderfully grand old time Bamboo Bernies turned out to be. The evening was replete with people ready to party and we were up to satisfying their elevated expectations. To that end we erected the entire drum monolith to support the caged, dual bass drum edifice that is the foundation for the pulsating tunes AnK pumps out. Adorn that with the lights and you get an unparalleled visual presentation, the type of presentation expected with the caliber of musicianship presented. Everyone head banged and gyrated to their favorite tunes of yore and the sing along for the entire second set was awesome! It looked like the wave at a ballgame. You people really know how to have a good time.

Thanks abound to our numerous friends and supporters there among the sold out crowd. The list is long so here goes. We’ll start by shouting happy birthday to Sandy, who has been out with her sister Stephanie and supporting AnK the last couple of years. Thanks aplenty to Hammerjacks Steve for audio and video production and John from Metro Sounds for the killer house and monitor mix. A plethora of hearty AnK gratitudes also go out to Matt W., Photoman Tom, Sterling & the Mrs, Lady Diana, Kimberly & Dawn, 1/2 Bearded Jeff, Amy (thumbs up on the tattoo), the Bon Jovi girls (Tammy & Amy), Jeanette, Linda, Becky, Wendy, Joe, Denise, Jeanine, Larry, Keith & Brian (thanks for making the long haul), Sean, trachea man, Jill & the gang, the entire Lincoln Tech crew, Maura with a U, Carl, Mr. Sloppy 2nds, Cindy & Dave, Kelly Davis, Mark, Christie, Sam, and Connie. My back (specifically L4 & L5) would also like to thank Boots & Chris for doing the majority of the set up and break down.

Special thanks go out to Troy and the Bamboo staff for their hospitality and backing. It is always a blast playing for you guys. Thanks to Laura for the buttery nipple shots and Tracy for the energy (you need to bottle and sell that – this Def Leppard’s for you!). We also want to extend our thoughts and prayers to Matt, whose Mom is in the hospital.

Coming soon, the chronicles of our performance at McAvoys!

"Tearin' in up in the daytime, burning it down at night. How long does it take? To break the spell? Straight to the top. Tooth and Nail!"

April 5th - Memories Chapter 6:2 - Beer & Liquor, Meatloaf & Fabreeze

Memories never disappoints when we are there. It is always a cornucopia of assorted head banging minions that flock to the mecca of 80’s hard rock & heavy metal to hear the message espoused by Alive-n-Kickin’. Upon the heartily constructed AnK stage extension, Dimetrius led our choir in delivering the message of the 80’s. Our message was dispensed with passionate fervor and returned just as zealously. It was an incredibly spiritual night!

Lots of thanks go out to all the special people that thronged Memories. Shout out to the Meatloaf gang of Susie, Leah, and Michelle for the dancing and support. I’ll practice until my fingers can make the secret hand code. Anyone find the Fabreeze? A sisterly “we luv ya!” goes out to Kelley for standing by her five “brothers” and doing all the little things that help keep things flowing. The Quiet Storm is an octopus, simultaneously keeping us hydrated, taking pictures, peddling merchandise, and helping with spontaneous repairs as well as making last minute trips to the local Wal-Mart for a camera (BTW, what’s with all the butt shots?). To Hammerjacks Steve for the audio and video excellence in capturing AnK at their best. A drunken salute to Will for the head banging support. Hugs to our buddy Kimo Kersse for coming out and hanging with his brothers. Shout out to my lifting buddy Lou, the heavyweight beast of the strongman competition from earlier that day. Happy birthday to Brenda sporting her lovely AnK spaghetti T! Thank also to Pam, Joe, Jeff, Sandy, Jeff & Cat, Crystal, Anne, Ona, John, Stacy, Michelle, Bob, Rick & Sue, the moshing and head banging dude, Ed, and Dave. Final gratis to Phil behind the sound board for the excellent job.

Next weekend has us pulling the ever challenging double header. Friday night April 11th has the party heading north to Pasadena to one of our favorite stomping grounds, Bamboo Bernies. Get there early because last time the line was out the door and around the corner to get in. Rumor also has it that Ed Nugent will be making a special appearance, entertaining everyone with naught but his guitar and a loin cloth.

Saturday April 12th has us going even farther north through the tunnel to Parkville for another night of 80’s hard rock & heavy metal at McAvoys, nee Putty Hill Station. The environment is cozier but definitely conducive to partying so those of you that don’t want to deal with the daunting crowds should not miss this one!

"Whoa, can we rewind to where we've been. Ooh I wish you'd take a look and see the shape I'm in..."

March 20th - What's new in the world of AnK?

Hi Everyone. Just wanted to scribe a quick note updating the latest happenings in the world of AnK. Even though we have been off the last couple of weekends, we have been diligently working up new material as well as reviewing all your 80's hard rock and heavy metal favorites. It is amazing how many frequent flyer miles Ed has piled up in the pursuit of 80's heavy metal perfection. The early half of April has us playing some really cool shows so make sure to come on out and enjoy a show reminiscent of the 80's concerts of yore, only on a more intimate level. See you at a show soon!

March 8th - To points north!

Not to be outdone by yesterday’s heavenly deluge, Saturday turned out to be the hoar frost winds blowing down from the arctic north at gale-force strength. I’ll bet the mighty Zephyrs were bushed after expunging so much force into their winded furies. I drive an Expedition and I could feel it getting blown about as I raced north up I-83 at the last minute in the hopes of getting to Harrisburg to play the gig at Gullifty’s alongside my heavy metal brethren. Fate brought me to my destination unscathed with 30 minutes to spare and luckily I have my rig set up in a most efficient manner, one that allows for minimal set up and break down so 10 minutes later I was unpacked, plugged in, tuned up, strapped in and ready to fire out the best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal. I must say the people in Harrisburg must have never seen an extended range bass because the Kodak moment faces of awe and puzzlement were too numerous to count.

I have to compliment and thank all the people at Gullifty’s as well as our newfound friends in Leadfoot for their graciousness and hospitality. We were welcomed to the stage to cheers and applause which rose into a thunderous crescendo as the set went on, culminating in an orgasmic spew of appreciative cheer at the conclusion of Still of the Night. Even a broken E string (Snakeskin gauge 107) could not detract from the festive atmosphere of the night.

Our friends in Leadfoot certainly did not disappoint in their presentation of heavy metal or their animated stage show. This is a band you all need to check out next time they are in our area. Not only are they a great group of musicians but they are also a great bunch of guys as well.

Thanks to our friends that journeyed north to join us, Pierre, Tawnya, and Rob. A thousand gratitudes to our buddy Ray Justus who was on stand-by ready to weave his magic on the bass in case I could not play the gig due to Nico’s christening earlier that afternoon. You are an awesome friend, the secret 6th member of AnK. Thanks to Gullifty’s for taking a chance on a band unknown to them and finally our friends in Leadfoot for letting us share the stage with you. We plan on returning the favor soon.

The next two weeks gives us a much needed repast before our next whirlwind of live performances. Keep an eye on our shows page, as it is constantly evolving. Don’t forget to sign the guestbook and leave some love and let us know what songs requests you have so we can get to work on them.

“Your cruel device. Your blood like ice. One look could kill. My pain, your thrill. ”

March 7th - "It's because it's a venue and not a bar"

I thought our last trip to Macs in early February had us traveling through a torrential deluge but it does not compare to the ferocity and sheer volume of precipitation cast down upon us from the heavens. The biblical-like monsoon coupled with the ever increasing stupidity of Maryland drivers made what should have been a 1 ½ hour trip into a 2 ½ hour ordeal. I think it is safe to say with certainty that if someone dropped a stupid bomb 85% of the people on the road would be instantly consumed. My middle finger is actually sore today from all the bird flippings cast about to each moron that thinks they are participating in the Indy 500.

After traversing over the Key Bridge and across the Poo-Poo Choo-Choo, our destination was at hand. Some higher being must have finally taken pity on us and allowed a break in the rains so we could hump gear inside. Immediately after we completed unloading the trailer, our trucks, and Ed’s rental Hyundai the rains began anew.

So even though the rains did not deter us from our quest to deliver the message of 80’s hard rock & heavy metal, it apparently thwarted the arrival of many planned patrons, necessitating an early wrap up on the night’s festivities. It was refreshing to cast away the rigidity of the song list and allow for a more spontaneous evening with the crowd offering up requests that we gladly performed on the fly.

Special thank you’s need to go out to all our friends that braved the weather to come party with us. Special AnK shout outs go to Nancy, Beni, Dawn & Mike, Steevo, Karen & Anthony, Ray & Angel, and Lori & friend for coming out on an abbreviated evening. Thanks also to Boots for helping schlep gear on such a dreary night.

Tomorrow night has us heading north up into the deep bowels of Pennsylvania to Gullifty’s in Harrisburg for an hour long opening set for our friends in Leadfoot. We are excited at the opportunity of heading north and unleashing the best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal to the denizens north of Maryland so to those of you that gripe we play too far away, you have no excuse for not showing up and to the rest of you I say, “road trip!”

“The sun never sets for souls on the run. The wild and the young.”

March 1st - Cryers Back Road Inn

The drive to Cryers Back Road Inn this past Saturday did not seem as long, arduous, or daunting as the initial trip back in December. Maybe it was because it was not as cold, maybe it was because Steve was hauling the trailer this time or maybe it was the fact that I survived the trip once and it did not seem so daunting the second time around. Regardless of the reason, Cryers turned out to be a real fun night where we partied with lots of old and new friends. We even saw many of our Memories crowd here for another night of 80’s hard rock & heavy metal mayhem! The night would have scored a 10 for 10 had it not been for the heartburn I got from the pizza there. I used to have the gullet of a billy goat and I guess I’m becoming more digestively sensitive in my old age.

Thanks aplenty go out to Shannon for the great rendition of Screaming in the Night, Jackie for enlightening everyone on auxiliary apparati for home pleasure, Jeff & Cat, Al, Rob & Marley and her sister and hubby (sorry I don’t know your names), Billie from MySpace, Chaz, Mike & Kelly, and Pat & Laura. Thanks to Brian and Dave for the stellar job on sound and lights (those laser beams are COOL!).

This upcoming weekend has us back at Macs the Club in Essex on Friday March 7th hammering out the 80’s tunes of yore on the biggest, coolest, stage in the Baltimore area. If you haven’t been to Macs you are truly missing out on Baltimore’s next big rock venue. Saturday March 8th has us loading the truck and heading up I-83 deep into the heart of William Penn’s colony (Pennsylvania) to New Cumberland to perform an opening 1 hour set at Gullifty’s for our hard rocking friends in Leadfoot. You definitely need to check these guys out when they come back around here. After this weekend we will be off for a few so make sure to come on out and rock with the AnK!

"With trembling hand we reach for it all, two restless hearts waiting to fall."

February 29th - Memories Chapter 6:1 - Happy Leap Year!

Before I go into the usual news presentation, I have to express a sort of epiphany that hit me a couple of weeks ago. Back in 1991 Ed and I were in an original band called In 'n' Out. You can hear some of our originals on my MySpace page. That band practiced in the basement of my father's dental office. Even though Dad has hung up the extraction forceps (actually, he gave them to me and I use them in my office now), the office is still on Eastern Ave. and it is being used at times as a practice facility for Alive-n-Kickin'. I find it nostalgic and ironic that I am practicing music in the same place from the infancy of my music career.

OK, enough of the nostalgic drivel. Even with the dreaded smoking ban fully enforced Memories was still packed to the gills and rocking out. Everybody was firing on all cylinders with only the occasional break to run to the designated outdoor smoking lounge to grab a quick drag so as to minimize down time from the packed and frenetic dance floor. Makes me wonder if all those people were out celebrating Leap Year? Nah, they were there for us :)

You people in southern Maryland deserve a special thank you for the support you have shown us since the band's inception in 2002. Some of the faces out there have been with us since day 1. Thanks aplenty go out to Monster, Quiet Storm, and Chord Bitch for all the usual love and support that they have bestowed upon us since the beginning. Hugs to our buddy Stewart for coming out and helping move gear. Thanks also to Faye, Kerry, Jeff & Cat, Crystal, Dawn & Fred, Danny & Carrie, Juanita & Will, John, Bobbi & Jody, Christine & Lisa, and Anne & Ona as well as the Memories crew (Crash, Phil Donald, Kelly, Judine, John, John).

Tomorrow night has us back at Cryer's Back Road Inn in Leonardtown and we plan on having another intense night of 80's rock. Hopefully Pete won't get disoriented and end up in the wrong restroom again.

"You're too hot to handle, way too cold to hold........................"

February 15th - Where's Ed?

Ya know, it seems lately there is always some proverbial monkey wrench being tossed into our well oiled machine. This time it was Trans-Air. Ed’s flight back from Atlanta was delayed to where he could not make it to the club until after 10 pm. Luckily, guitarist extraordinaire Glenn Campbell (No Strings Attached, Temper Temper) came to the rescue allowing for an awesome first set. The casual fans were unaware of the change but since most of the crowd was there for AnK, you could see a lot of head scratching and furrowed brows, puzzled at the stranger standing where the mighty Smirnoff Ice usually is. Ed arrived unscathed and we were able to carry on business as usual for sets 2 and 3. The only other glitch was Steve’s compensatory appendage…err…Corvette ZR1’s alarm blaring out front. You could see anxiety welling up in a perspirous effusion as Steve expressed angst over the well-being of his compensatory appendage …err….Corvette ZR1. Luckily all was well and there were no marks on Steve’s compensatory appendage.

A turdload of thanks need to be dispensed to our ever growing legion of 80’s hard rock & heavy metal fans. To Kelley and Chris for humping gear, lighting production, pictures, and help in all things mundane. Shout out to Nancy for pictures and the brainchild of MAR, which will soon be a force for old-school metal on the local scene. Keep an eye out for it. To Faye for pictures and being there since day 1 – you will always be family, :) Yummy to Momma-Beast Kathy for the awesome cherry cheesecake. A techie holler out to Hammerjacks Steve for all the behind-the-scenes hard work in various audio and video projects for AnK. Look for some of this stuff to be available here and on our MySpace page soon. Thanks also to all the people that came out just to have a good time with us on a pleasant Friday night – Danette, Danny (thanks for being Mark Brunel/Troy Smith), Myles E. (great job on R&R), Jeanette (I found my cheese), Wendy, Vicky, Chrissy, Dawn & Mike, Karen, Matt W., Marla & Jim, Brenda, Kim & Charles, Katie & Dennis, Missy & Kenny, Tina & JJ, Peggy, Ness, Danny, Gary, Josh G.Stacy, Lady Di, Trachea Man, Tim, Bill, Ashley, Dave & Regina, Lana & Bill, Lacey, DJ Mike, ½ bearded Jeff, Miranda & Jesse, Lisa, Steve, Mike, Brain, Jeremy, Josh, Pete, Chuck, JD, Mr. SS & pal, and finally John at Metro sounds for the killer sound production. As always, thanks to Troy & the staff at Bamboos for the hospitality.

Final thank you to Glenn Campbell for coming in at the last minute cold and helping keep things going until the cavalry could arrive. You are a true gentleman and scholar.

Thanks to everyone that also came out to help celebrate the Corrupt Beast’s birthday, as he inches ever so closely to that mark of 40. I shouldn’t talk, as my next birthday is the dreaded 4-0 and I am sure the plannings have already begun as to how to celebrate such a momentous occasion.

Next weekend is an off weekend for the band because of my implant residency (#7 of 8 – almost there!), but the following weekend presents a southern Maryland double header with Memories in Waldorf on Friday February 29th and Cryers Back Road Inn in Leonardtown on Saturday March 1st. We plan on no repeating of songs so you can expect a different show each night.

No one was able to answer correctly the riddle "If Valentine's Day is for couples what holiday is for single people?" Answer: Palm Sunday :)

"I'm in & out of trouble, I'm the talk of the town. I get wild inthe streets when the sun goes down."

February 9th - How can violets be blue when violet is a purple color?

Greetings & salutations my metal loving brethren. Just wanted to pen a quick blurb reminding all of you head bangers that we will be demolishing the stage at Bamboo Bernies Friday February 15th. On top of the theme of Valentine’s Day, we will also be celebrating Steve’s not-quite 40th birthday so make sure to mark your calendars, grab your honey, and come on out and party like we used to back in the 80’s. Make sure to arrive early so you aren’t stuck in line out the door.

Prize to the first person that can finish this riddle. If Valentine’s Day is for couples, what holiday is for single people? Answer to be posted here and on our MySpace page when solved.

February 1st - Baltimore's coolest live rock venue!

Given the amount of rain that teemed from the heavens all day long on Friday February 1st, I really felt I was going to have to convert the trailer into an ark and load up 2 of everything. The Gods must have been smiling down as the deluge broke around 3 pm and sunshine broke through the clouds, cascading down onto the drenched earth. So the trailer would not need to be altered into a flotation device after all. By land and highway the gear made its way north and slightly east over the Key Bridge and the world-renowned Poo-Poo Choo-Choo to our destination of Macs the Club in Essex.

If you have not been to Macs you are truly missing a cool club. The eclectic feel of a Legionaries Hall permeates the current rock theme to bring a unique rock and roll club. The stage is huge and the sound PA is one of the best in-house systems around. We really enjoy getting on that stage and feeling the music we create surge through us and out into the crowd, especially when we can play the true rocking songs from the 80’s. It felt great to regale everyone with new songs and also pull out some old ones we have not done in ages.

Thanks aplenty go out to all our supportive friends that braved rain and cold to come party with us. Thanks to Kelley for hydration and pictures and tolerating the Chinese finger cuffs jokes :). Golf clap to our musician friends Eddie from Eye 4N Eye and Bill from Highwire. Curtsy and bows to Nancy, Juanita, Nina, Marion (the Sisterhood!), Will, Cleary, Lisa, Dawn & Mike, and Sterling for rocking the whole night with us. Final loving “slap-in-the-back-of-the-head-Dickhead!” goes out to Steve R. for hanging with us and feasting on Samos Greek food with me the next day! Thanks also to Michelle behind the bar, Jeff & friend for the killer sound & lights, and Frank for having us.

It seems every time I leave an east Baltimore County gig I have a story. This time a benign stop at the Royal Farms to get a bite to eat turned uncomfortable. Upon entering the front door of the Royal Farms in Highlandtown on Eastern Ave., you will notice the magazine rack on your immediate right. At the top of the rack are the girlie magazines and some older gentleman was standing smack dab in the middle of the aisle perusing one. He was so engrossed in the printed flesh that I had to interrupt his fantasizing to get him to realize he was blocking my entry into the store. Last thing I feel like dealing with is an old pervert at 3 am getting aroused in the main entry aisle at the Royal Farms store. Could you just buy the damn thing, go home, and take care of business? Geez. And everyone wonders why I moved away.

Anyway, after several days of therapy (j/k) we are preparing for our next grand event, Bamboo Bernies in Pasadena on February 15th. Not only will we be celebrating Valentine’s Day but also the Corrupt One’s birthday so we expect, nay promise, a festive night full of glee and merriment worthy of the grandest of Mardi Gras stages. You will kick yourselves immensely if you miss this one. Heart shaped beads will abound searching for ample bosoms to nestle between. Oh, and there will be 80’s hard rock & heavy metal, too!

"I know you ain't a bad girl honey, no matter what the neighbors say. Its just you wear those skin tight dresses with your G string tuned to A."

January 26th - AnK Happenings & Happy Brithday to the Quarter Beast

In the middle of celebrating Mr. Shane Dimitri’s 3rd birthday, I decided to scribe some quick news and give you people a quick update on AnK happenings. Lots of cool things have been going on and I feel compelled to share these wonderful tidbits with all of you, our loving and faithful friends and fans.

Alive-n-Kickin’ is proud to announce the addition of William Harris Jr. to the AnK family. Billy is best known for being the keyboard backbone in local sensation Surreal and we are pleased to have him on board as a member of Alive-n-Kickin’ so make sure to shower him with love and affection unique to the AnK faithful. I have extra towels on hand to wipe him down with afterwards and Bandicide for disinfection purposes.

Our shows page is replete with 80’s metal shows throughout the great state of Maryland. Our show has expanded into new venues as well as additional gigs booked in our staple clubs. Check out the shows page for details. Our next show is an 80’s metal extravaganza at Macs the Club in Essex. The place is under new management and is on the verge of becoming the next real Baltimore area hot spot for great live music so come check Macs out.

New songs have been added to our ever changing repertoire. As always, email us at alivenkickinband@yahoo.com with your suggestions. Please remember only 80’s hard rock & heavy metal. Keep it in the theme, ya know?

“Rock, rock ‘til you drop! Rock, rock never stop!”

January 11th - The Nuclear Onslaught!

The final leg of the Tony's Clubs Tour culminated with an intense and exhilarating gig full of energy and passion at Cancun Cantina. Actually, the fun started the night before. With me unable to make the drive to set up, Steve coordinated the methodical construction of the AnK stage show. The monolithic drum riser and concert-esque light show were all erected in anticipation of a phenomenal turn out Friday night. And what a turn out it was! Throngs of people packed the deck side of Cancun with everyone head banging and dancing in frenetic fashion. It was awesome, so much so that we lost track of time and had the power cut off mid-song (well, almost the end of the final song) due to strict liquor laws. You people definitely know how to party! I still get chills at everyone singing along to Faithfully.

Many thanks to our numerous friends and fans that graced us with their energetic presence. To our faithful core of friends that help take care of all the various duties; Kelley (photographs and hydration), Ajay (lights), Hammerjacks Steve (set up and video production), and Chris (trouble shooting and break down). An AnK "you rock girl!" to Shannon for the stellar rendition of Screaming in the Night. Great job to the Metro sounds tandem of Les, Les II, and John for the impeccable sound, audio tips & advice, and use of the spare Eon cabinet to power my ER Beasts while my current cube is being serviced. Thanks also to all of you peeps that came out to support the best of the 80's hard rock & heavy metal; Kathy (momma-beast! - your son is corrupt), Danette (Mrs. C-Beast), Matt W. (beer!), Patrick (great job on R&R All Night), Bill from Highwire, Nancy, Ed, Tawnya, Douglas M. (don't be a stranger! Miss you big fella!), Rob & Marley from Solomon’s Island, Jeanette & Linda, Vicki & friends, Julia the marketing guru, Butch, Jim & Carol, David, Dawn, Phil, Mike G. & Dave G. from Stiff Richard, Michelle, Tammy, the girl with the horseshoe tattoo on her left gluteal, the Judas Priest guy, Joe from Bamboos, and the throng of female dancers that mobbed the stage, forcing Dimetrius to sing from atop a barrel. Thanks also to the staff and management at Cancun Cantina for the hospitality.

The next couple of weeks has us taking a little time off to complete courses, celebrate the Quarter Beast's third birthday, and ponder the mysteries of the universe. In the meantime we will be working up a couple of new tunes for your listening enjoyment, as playing the same old stuff can get stale for the players and fans. We will return with an onslaught of shows in February starting with Macs the club on February 1st. The best kept secret in Essex has one of the best stages, light shows, and sound systems around, worthy of national concert acts so if you really want to experience a true 80's metal show, Macs is the place to see Alive-n-Kickin'.

"She gave me a wink and said I should think about it, maybe."

January 4th - Go West young man

If you have not been to the Cancun Cantina West then you need to make sure to mark it on your list of places to see when you are in Hagerstown. Tony’s latest club is a very nice, spacious, clean establishment with good food and great staff. Everyone working there was very kind and gracious. The hospitality afforded by the staff was refreshing so thank you and an AnK shout out to Jen, Gina, Misty, & Liz for being genuinely nice and keeping us (well, at least me) maximally hydrated throughout the evening. It was truly a fun gig and we look forward to a return trip.

Another plus was that the club is next door to the Clarion hotel. Being physically connected made it that much easier to stagger my inebriated self back to my room, though my sleep was constantly punctuated by Steve’s plaster-peeling, ear-splitting snoring. Sounded like the mating call of the North American Red-backed Moose. He was so loud the alley cats were ready to lob shoes at him.

We made lots of new friends tonight. Thanks to Rob, Kevin & Grace, Rene M. from Surreal for the great drums on R&R All Night, Tommy & Gina, the Wasted Years dude, the biker-marine guy that rocked and danced all night (sorry I did not get your name), Paul, Cheryl, Connie, Cindy & Ray, Tucker, Bill A., and Boomer. Special thanks to Les and Les Jr. for the always great job in sound production and bailing me out by having a spare monitor cabinet to replace my on-the-fritz bass cube. Thanks to Steve Baer for plowing me full of Jaeger bombs and home-brewed West Virginia moonshine. Now I know what turpentine tastes like.

A very special thank you and “I love you, f**kers” to my friends Steve, Beth, Larry, Karen, Uncle Mike, Mary, Craig, and Brenda who drove down from the mountains of Frostburg and beyond to come hang and party with us. It seems like yesterday that a newly graduated dental student and his-then fiancé moved to Cumberland with hopes and dreams and luckily met up and made friends with some of the greatest examples of human beings one could ask for. If you are ever in the Cumberland/Frostburg area, go check out their band Takoma Park, country music with a bang! (www.takomaparkband.com) Miss you guys! BTW, where the hell was Dave? Tell the old man I am disappointed!

This Friday is the final leg of the “Tony’s clubs” tour. We will be back at Cancun Cantina ready to bring the house down again. Be ready to rock and get ready to hear some new tunes we have been working on. We guarantee an evening worthy of remembrance and you will hate yourselves if you do not make it!

“In the night, call to me. You know I want your touch of evil.”

December 30th - Bye, bye 2007!

What an exciting night the final gig of 2007 turned out to be at Bamboo Bernies. The energy and passion was so intense the fog machine blew a gasket and proceeded to spew ungodly amounts of smoke. When the yellow light shined through it I wanted to grab a gas mask and dive to the bottom of a trench. Luckily the ventilation system is top-notch and the mustard gas cloud was quickly disbursed. I think Steve was secretly supplying the smoke machine with performance-enhancing drugs, which would explain its inflated statistical output (sounds like Viagra). Of course, no Viagra was needed, as a purple clad well-endowed young lady in the front row danced and undulated madly, unknowingly dictating the tempo of the music. It was apparent at that point that Steve was over his previous night’s illness.

As always, it was a pleasure to perform the duel-keyboard Xmas Eve Sarajevo (Carol of the Bells) for everyone. Your response to it was awesome and intense!

It seems the list of characters to thank gets longer at each show. I am at the point where I have to jot down notes to remember everyone. My apologies if a deserving person was omitted from the list. The news thank you is never complete without the initial lauding of appreciation to the people behind the scenes that keep us in order and whose help is invaluable – Stacey, Kelley, Pete (pendulous ankle swinger), Hammerjacks Steve, Ajay, and Chris. Thank you to our friends in Highwire (Bill & Lurch), Nancy, Binelda, Nina, Ed, Wendy, the Journey Girls (Becky, Debbie, Vicki), ½ bearded Jeff, the Judas Priest guy, Martie & Joey Dove from Stiff Richard, David, Kyle, Rich, Mikey, Rob & Marley, Debbie, Christine, Jessica & Rob, Ronnie W., Mr. sloppy seconds, Joann, Tiffany & Brandi, Mrs. Dash, and finally to the mammaric metronome for establishing cadence. Happy birthday to Stacy! Thanks to Les I and Les II for the awesome job with sound and Ajay for the stellar light show. Gratis to Troy and the entire Bamboos staff for their utmost professionalism and accommodations. A final thank you to the rest of Anne Arundel County for showing up.

No rest for the weary as we load the gear and head up the road to Hagerstown, Md. for our debut gig at the newly opened Cancun Cantina West. All of you people out in Western Maryland that have been clamoring for us to play that way now have no excuse for not showing up. The rest of us will be bringing our lunchables to stay nourished on the long ride. There is also a hotel (Clarion Antieta – 301-733-5100) connected to the club that anyone that is too tried or too drunk to drive can stay at.

Hey Ed, dirt called again. Please………..

“Just when I thought she was coming to my door, she whispered sweet and brought me to the floor”

December 29th - Through adversity we shall triumph!

Every gig has a pre-show routine, a preparatory ritual that has been honed and tweaked since day one so that nothing is forgotten and all matters have been addressed to ensure a smooth transition to the gig. Imagine my horror and shock at the phone call this Friday around 4:15 pm from the Corrupt Beast expressing his inability to play tonight due to illness. Apparently a bad case of Bubonic Plague had struck down the bedrock of the band. But have no fear! Through addled and clouded mind, Steve called friend and mentor Myles Evans (DC Star) to sit in. Myles is truly a professional and one of the great drum wizards. His performance was excellent and even more stellar given the short notice he received. Think about it, how many people can show up to a gig and play a night’s worth of songs cold, with no rehearsing or preparation and not miss a beat? Incredible!

The night went very well and everyone was definitely into the best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal. The newly reconstituted version of Alive-n-Kickin’ pounded out all your favorite tunes without missing a beat.

Thanks abound aplenty for the mass of people that thronged Memories and rocked with us. Smooches to the usual suspects Kelley (wake up!), Stacey and “cord bitch & shirt folder” Pete for always keeping us hydrated, photographed, and on our best behavior (much easier to do with Santa Beads out sick). Shout outs to our friends Faye, Susie, Molly, and Kerry for the support. Hey Faye, have you reciprocated for the camera yet? ;) A “you friggin’ rock!” goes out to birthday boy Dion and the Gold’s crew (Jeremy, Bryan, Jamie, Sarah). Thank you also to Rod and the misses, Scott, Lisa, Paul, Mike, Tracy (happy birthday as well), Linda & Jen, Rob & Sarah, Bill, Devin, Colleen, Brandi, and Joe. Special thanks to Carol for helping fold and peddle merchandise and to John for keeping her energy up through yeast & hop based alcoholic infusion. Kudos to Phil for the usual great job of sound & lights. Thanks also to Judine for the pizza and advertising and finally to Donald for just having us.

Special shout out to Wayne from King’s Mountain, North Carolina who knows that Alive-n-Kickin’ rocks!

Again, a special thank you with all the appropriate hugs, kisses, licks and gropes to Myles Evans for helping turn a potential disaster into an awesome night. You da man!

I personally want to send out a thank you and “aw, shucks” to all you people that have been complimenting me on my playing these past few gigs. I have been wood shedding a lot, working on my theory and chops and it must be paying off considering all the kudos I have been receiving. Thanks again!

Tonight we are heading into Bamboo Bernies ready to start the New Years party in Pasadena early. Our rendition of TSO’s Xmas Eve Sarajevo (Carol of the Bells) will be performed tonight as well as the usual best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal. Steve will be performing tonight and we plan on having our last gig of 2007 be our most memorable to date. Don’t miss it!

December 23rd - Happy Frickin' Holidays

We in Alive-n-Kickin' would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for your support of the band these past several years and we look forward to continuing to bang out the best of the 80's hard rock & heavy metal. It has been your unwavering support and loyal devotion that have made AnK the musical force it is today. So from all of us in the band, please have a safe and Happy Holidays as we get ready to climax the old year with a double header weekend (Memories in Waldorf on Friday 12/28, Bamboo Bernies in Pasadena on Saturday 12/29). Happy Christmakwanzaanukah!

The only local band able to pull off Xmas Eve Sarajevo (Carol of the Bells) by the Trans Siberian Orchestra au naturale.

December 7th - and the winner is.......................

Congratulations to Chris, Stacey, and Susie for all answering the news stumper correctly. Road to Nowhere is an Ozzy Osbourne song. Your prize is the privilege of being acknowledged on this here news page. It is truly an honor reserved for only the most revered and unique people, individuals that have proven their mettle and risen to a height few mortals in all the annals of recorded history have achieved. Kudos to you all.

Gotta go, Rudolph's Shiny New Year is on!

"Zounds and Gadzooks! We must save the baby Happy!"

December 1st - I have to pee!

Even though I live in Southern Maryland I did not realize that it extended so far to the southeast. Living so close to the Nice Hairy Bridge gives you a false sense of where the borders of the great state of Maryland are. I am submitting paperwork to the Maryland Transportation Authority to have Rt 234 renamed as the Road To Nowhere (quick: first person that can guess the song and artist reference gets a quick shout out on these here news pages). They will probably tell me to go place my phallus in my own rectum. Anyway, after feeling like Columbus’ crew as they sailed farther away from the old world, civilization appeared on the horizon. The familiar sights of capitalism (gas, food, booze, retail stores) brought a soothing calm to my worked up self from the drive. Another couple miles down the road and our destination was at hand!

First glance at Cryers may not give the impression of a rock club but looks can be deceiving and the people in Leonardtown sure know how to party. The cozy confines of Cryers actually enhanced the festive atmosphere, as everyone was so close to each other you could not help but absorb the love emanating from the patrons. It was so great that poor Pete became disoriented, innocently ending up in the ladies room while on attempt at a routine 10-100, his faux pas unbeknownst to him until an awkward meeting with Kelley in said restroom brought him the realization of “oops, wrong pisser.”

A special shout out to all our new friends we made at Cryers, Tracy, Shannon, Colleen, Eric, Scott, Jerry (thank you for the bass compliments and intelligent inquiry). Get ready to really rock when we return on March 1st. Special licks and slurps to our usual AnK support crew of Stacey, Kelley, and Pete (the sign should say “Mens”). Than you also to Danette, Al & Kelly, Tawnya, Caitlin and my lifting buddy Lou. Kudos to Brian G. for the terrific sound and musical camaraderie and finally a special AnK welcome to Bill Harris for being able to come on board with minimal notice and do a bang up job on keys.

Child labor laws aside, thanks to Steve's niece Hailey for stringing together a plethora of beads just in time for the show. It was reminiscent of a demented Oliver Twist, Hailey being poor Oliver and Steve being the maniuplative Fagan (no, not Faggot you deviants).

Our condolences go out to Steve as he still holds faith out in the Redskins having success this year. Someone needs to get the burgundy and gold Kool-Aid away from him.

The next couple of weeks has us off preparing for the holidays. In between the shopping, decorating, gift wrapping, and eating we will be working on old and new material and getting prepared for our double header shows of Memories on Dec. 28 and Bamboo Bernies Dec. 29. If we do not see any of you before the holidays, we in Alive-n-Kickin’ wish you and your families a wonderful, safe and happy holiday.

"Keep on walking that road and I'll follow. Keep on calling my name I'll be there................"

November 29th - The victorious Beast!!!

Thanks to all of you that voted and nominated Steve as Baltimore's favorite drummer on the Baltimore Rock Review poll. He is honored and humbled (if that is possible). I believe the next voting will be for best bead distribution, which Steve should win hands down (or shirts up!).

November 17th - Beware the Enforcer

Even though there were several bands playing within the local area at every venue that features live music, the people of Southern Maryland knew where to go for the real party as Memories was packed to the gills. We have been playing Memories since the bands inception back in late 2002 and we still love gigging there. From the staff to the clientele, everyone is wonderfully pleasant and easy to interact with. Just a great wholesome place for fun and good times.

The thanks abound aplenty to all our friends here in Southern Maryland. They include the usual band cache of Kelley, Stacey, and Pete. Honorable mention to Rebel & Angel, Kerry, Pam, Big Lou, Scott, Cindy, Brian, Al & Kelly, Susie & JoAnn (even if you could only stay for one set), Judine, Brenda, Paul, Jim, Tim McGraw, and Niki. Kudos to Phil for the awesome job running sound and Donald for the great light show.

A special shout out to Pete “the enforcer,” who did not hesitate to defend the honor of a young woman when some besotted lout made inappropriate advances.

Finally, on a more somber note, we bid Kimo a fond adieu and good luck as he is bowing out of Alive-n-Kickin’ to work on his own project. Kimo is an excellent musician and even better person and we wish him the best in all his endeavors. Keep a look out for his yet unnamed project.

Next up is Cryers Back Road Inn in Leonardtown. I hear that this place is happening and not to be fooled by it’s cozy confines. We look forward to traipsing down to the bottom most point of Maryland to bring you the best of the 80’s hard rock & heavy metal. Be there!

Finally, we in Alive-n-Kickin’ would like to wish all of our families, friends, and fans a safe and Happy Thanksgiving. I will be with my in-laws, overeating and then doing my best Al Bundy impersonation while watching football. Life is so good :)

November 16th - Kicking off the Bad Santa tour

Traffic. ‘Nuff said. Next idiot driver that tries to squeeze by the trailer while it is backing up is going to feel the wrath of Sparta on their asses!

The show at Bamboos was HOT!!!! I don’t think you could have packed anymore intensity into the place. The disciples of the 80’s were out in full force absorbing the audible creations emitting forth from the stage. Our duel keyboard version of Trans Siberian Orchestra's Xmas Eve Sarajevo (Carol of the Bells) was a major hit and we will continue to play it throughout the holiday season.

Thank you to the slew of people that came out to support AnK. Shout outs to Matt W. (you forgot someone), Stephanie, Sherri, Sandy, Wendy, Jeanette, Linda, Nina (the bass is not that heavy!), Chuck, Stephanie with the ninja tattoo, Charles R., Toni, Photo Man Tom, 1/2 bearded Jeff, Tracy, Brian, Joe S, Vince, Ron & Karen, Jill & Bobby, Ken, Tony, Cindy, Mark, Christine, and Valerie. Special shout out to our friends Kirsten, Bill, and Lurch from the band Highwire. You really need to check them out. Also thanks to Dave & Sean from Korupt, our 80’s metal brethren that started out playing the same clubs and dives we did back in the 80’s. God help us all we are getting old! Thanks as well to Troy and the staff at Bamboos for their usual accommodation and professionalism. Thanks also to John for the great sound and being director of bead distribution.

As always, a special round of hugs, feels, and scratches to our friends (Kelley, Stacey, Pete, Ajay, Steve) that take care of all the behind-the-scenes BS grunt work without ever complaining or asking anything in return. If they do complain we don’t pay attention anyway. They are all part of the family and without their help, love, support, and ass kicking, we would not be able to present the music to all of you. Special thanks to the momma-beast for stringing together about 600 pairs of Bad Santa beads, which her proud son distributed to every individual with anything that remotely resembled a pair of mammaries.

An Alive-n-Kickin’ happy birthday goes out to Wendy. We truly appreciate all your support.

Tomorrow night has us invading Southern Maryland back at one of our favorite stomping grounds, Memories in Waldorf. We look forward to seeing Donald, Crash, Judine, Kelly, and the rest of the staff as well as all our rockin’ friends and plan on having just as intense a night.

"Passion burns, I felt the fire. Heaven sent but baby you're not the one."

Greetings and salutations! Welcome everyone to the introduction of the Alive-n-Kickin' news page where, just like CNN, you can check in to the latest news and happenings concerning Alive-n-Kickin'. You can also contact the band through this link and we will gladly announce whatever you like (within FCC guidelines). Also, you can let us know what songs you would like the band to do by contacting us at george@alive-n-kickin.net or signing our guestbook. Peace!